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Entry tags:
Reckless Mistake | J2 | NC-17 (Domestic Dreams verse)
Title: Reckless Mistake
Words: 3600
Rating/Warnings: NC-17/escort!Jensen
Summary: Jensen is a high-priced escort unable to say no to Jared, the lonely businessman craving normalcy
Notes: Domestic Dreams Verse. This is essentially Jensen’s POV of An Unconventional Contract, when Jared asks for the domestic arrangement. Title and cut from Imagine Dragons’ Polaroid.
Read on AO3
Jensen strolls into the suite with an easy smile that dissipates once Jared opens his mouth.
“I need to talk,” rushes out before Jared takes a short pause and corrects himself. “I mean, we. We need to talk.”
Breath catches in Jensen’s chest and he swears he hears his heart beating a little louder in his ears. His movements, on the other hand, are sluggish and tense, stopping in place and carefully turning to find Jared starting up a steady pace around the living room.
A dozen scenarios flash through his mind, many based on actual trouble he’s faced. Threats of calling the police, public photos, angry wives that clients insisted never existed are just the start.
“Is everything okay?” Jensen finally asks, doing his best to keep his voice steady. To keep himself pulled together and calm. There’s no sense in working himself up in a fury if this is just another one of Jared’s flares of anxiety.
Perverse as it is, Jensen so very much hopes that’s all it is. Like the few times they’ve been spotted in the bar downstairs, that one time they dared to head out for dinner, or even when Jensen found himself face to face with one of Jared’s coworkers in the elevator. That probably would not have been such a problem if Jensen hadn’t already introduced himself as an old college friend - who was engaged ... to a woman - and it wasn’t six in the morning.
Jared’s manic look, wide eyes frantically searching the room to avoid Jensen’s own worried gaze, cuts deep in Jensen’s gut and he’s now afraid for his own sanity. So he forces himself into crisis management and stands tall, shoulders firm, and hands on his waist as he waits for Jared to speak again.
It’s an absurdly long amount of waiting, patience worn thin and the impulse to bolt growing stronger by the second.
When Jared finally speaks again, it’s with a slow stutter tracing all his worries. “I just …I can’t … I don’t know … how.”
Jensen blinks. A dark little corner of his brain tells him this may not be a disaster of legal or physical conditions. Maybe it’s something emotional, something so wholly Jared that Jensen has to once again triage and heal with that side of him that weakens every time he walks out this door. The one that flares to life when he walks in.
Direct and cutting right through, Jensen asks, “Don’t know what? Is it life threatening?”
“Maybe. I don’t know.” Jared tugs at his hair before pushing it behind his ears. Along with Jared himself, his hair is a complete mess, and Jensen has thoughts of pulling Jared in tight and combing it into place, fingers sliding through soft waves with careful comfort to ease them both.
“No,” Jared continues. “In the big picture. Not really.”
“Is it anything that’ll get either of us in trouble?”
“No, nothing like that.”
Fear of the law, a court and judge that would hold nothing but contempt for Jensen’s side hustle, drops away from the list of possibilities and Jensen sighs. Tension drains from his shoulders down to his toes, though he’s trussed up with worry as Jared quietly apologizes.
“Did you do something?” Jensen asks, now flying through his list of contacts and clients, wondering who can handle whatever trouble Jared’s gotten himself into.
“Not yet,” he mutters.
“Okay, you need to relax,” Jensen orders as he heads to the side bar for drinks. He’s not equipped to handle whatever Jared is bringing to his doorstep without some liquor calming him. “And sit down.”
Two heavy pours and Jensen’s tempted to down them both himself. When he sees Jared listen to the directions and fall back into the couch, Jensen takes a simple sip of his own and offers a small smile along with the glass to Jared.
He sits in front of Jared, perching at the edge of the coffee table and leaning forward. He finds himself drinking in time with Jared and, beyond the soft tendril of heat spinning in his chest thanks to the alcohol, he thinks it’s good for them both. To sit in silence and find a rhythm somewhere between them to relax.
Jared glances at Jensen every few seconds, eyes darting away in shame. His mouth opens a few times until he finally complains, mostly to himself, “This is going to sound ridiculous.”
It takes a moment or two to make his voice smooth and level, hoping to calm them both. “I’m sure it won’t.”
From there, words fly between them and Jensen isn’t sure how they tumble down the hill together, but he suddenly finds himself staring a stack far thicker than usual in a familiarly innocent white envelope resting in his hands.
In this line of work, he’s been asked for a hundred things in a hundred different ways. There have been the rare moments he’s had to put his foot down, depending on the act or even the client, but he’s usually up for anything … all in the name of client satisfaction.
Here, he’s facing one client he will do just about anything to satisfy.
Jensen wonders what lies beyond just about.
The worry forces him to put the envelope on the chair beside him, placing it out of reach as they sort this thing out. As Jensen’s mind tumbles around the various possibilities, Jared’s request halts anything Jensen had been prepared to say.
“Pretend it’s a relationship ... when we’re together.”
Breathing is a labored thing, just like thinking becomes complicated.
Jensen knows he was already in trouble and this would be his complete unraveling. As if he wasn’t already spiraling away from sanity where Jared’s concerned, allowing his carefully constructed wall between business and real life crumble.
H’s long known, it hadn’t gone unnoticed, that Jared was seeking a connection, something more than just a quick fuck for cash.
Jensen fucking knew they were heading somewhere like this and he hadn’t done a single thing to stop them.
Just like he does nothing to stop it now, tumbling headfirst as he shifts to the edge of the table to watch Jared’s eyes flit closed and open.
“I’m sorry,” Jared whispers. This little boy is so low, lost, and broken, the sound cracks something deep in Jensen’s chest.
And like all the times before, Jensen will do whatever he can to put Jared back into a whole piece that can manage to look in the mirror without shame shadowing every angle of that beautiful face.
Jensen thinks he can see the ledge approaching fast as he makes his decision, leaping right off into a bottomless hole of hopelessness.
That’s what he is. Hopeless. All while Jared buries his hope far beneath the surface, dragging it out to the light whenever he sees Jensen.
Maybe, in another world, they’d be utterly perfect for one another.
When Jared opens his eyes again and searches Jensen’s face, that split in Jensens chest fuses itself over and something warm and easy fills him up. It brings a smile to his face and he brushes Jared off, brushes his own alarms away, and offers a gentle smile as he pulls off his jacket and takes care to set it over the envelope, hiding it away for the evening.
A burst of heat gets him moving forward to press a kiss to Jared’s forehead, murmuring on his way back to sit. “You’re adorable when you fidget.”
“I’m not,” Jared replies, pushing the words out like a petulant toddler.
Jensen slips into what should be a wholly constructed character, but is, in fact, not far from his own truth when he smirks and says, “And when you’re utterly clueless, babe.”
There’s a long pause after babe, and Jensen holds his breath with fear that it’s too much, especially so fast.
Jared’s eyes brighten, shoulders shifting with relief. “You’re starting already.”
Walls be damned, Jensen can play himself better than any other persona in his tool box, and he rolls up his shirt sleeves and pats Jared’s knees. “So what’d you want to do for dinner?”
Jared sucks in a deep breath with his eyes watering and cheeks going red, and Jensen runs his thumbs inside Jared’s knees while he keeps his gaze steady and caring, encouraging. “Room service?” Jared asks with a shaky laugh.
Nodding, Jensen easily agrees, “Room service it is.”
*
Jensen wakes before Jared and takes advantage of the quiet lull of daybreak to look at Jared beside him.
Hair covers part of his eye and cheek, half his face pressed into the pillow, most of his body tucked into itself. Except for one hand peeking out from under the covers and set on the mattress just a few scant inches from Jensen.
He lets himself have the moment to draw lines down each of Jared’s fingers as he thinks about the peace on Jared’s face as he sleeps. In direct contrast to when Jensen first showed up last night, Jared is comfortable and calm with whatever dreams keep him company.
Even when Jensen knows he’s plowed through every warning of the last two years with Jared, there’s great relief to see Jared at rest. To know Jared has found his middle ground to make this whole precarious situation work for him.
Jared’s fingers curl against the sheet, reaching and grabbing for something, and Jensen waits for him to wake. Holds his breath in anticipation of those sleepy eyes blinking to brightness.
Intead, Jared settles deeper in the blankets and Jensen kisses Jared’s knuckled fist then quietly slips from bed.
Room service is called, a full platter of eggs, pancakes, fruit, and bacon. Lots and lots of bacon, Jared’s favorite, he thinks with a smile. Jensen busies himself with an early morning show on the TV in the living room, at the ready for the knock at the door before it’s loud enough to drag Jared out of bed.
When the cart arrives, Jensen rolls it right into the bedroom, a smile spreading when Jared is coming out of sleep and pulling himself up against the headboard with a confused, yet pleased look.
“Breakfast in bed?”
Jensen nods then swats Jared’s leg with a quick, “Scoot,” to make room for him at the edge of the mattress. He slides into the small space so they’re facing each other, side by side, legs stretched out with plates resting in their laps.
Before Jared can ask, Jensen passes a glass of orange juice along with the tiny pitcher of syrup. Jared thanks him with an easy, charmed smile, and the continue to eat in silence while sharing pleased glances in between requests for coffee and sugar, more napkins, and bacon. Of course, bacon.
Halfway through, Jared drops his arms to his side, one hand landing on Jensen’s knee. He looks at Jensen, damn near diving right into him with the open, soft look. “Thank you.”
Jensen hides his face in favor of cutting more pancake. It shouldn’t make him shiver how kind Jared’s voice is, how intent his eyes are. But here Jensen is, doing his best to deflect with a breezy, “I know you love your bacon.”
“I do love my meat.”
A quick look and Jensen deadpans, eyes glazed over with a short grimace. “You …”
Jared chuckles, stuffing another strip of bacon in his mouth. “I do,” he says through chewing with full, pink cheeks.
Jensen raises a quick eyebrow before letting a smile slip through, along with a sneaky glance before pulling more eggs together with his fork.
“I also love breakfast in bed,” Jared says, again kind and hushed. His hand rubs along the side of Jensen’s leg, fingers curling under.
“You’re welcome.” After a full drink of coffee, Jensen watches him and carefully aligns the right words that fit their new charade. “But don’t settle in too much. We have to get ready and head off to work soon. I know you’ve got a full day of meetings again.”
“I do,” Jared agrees as he puts his plate to the side. He leans in with his hand moving up Jensen’s leg until it’s settled at the hip. “But we could shower together, save some time.”
Jensen’s reminded of waking not long ago when Jared was so at ease, and Jared continues be loose and relaxed. There are no startled thoughts as he second-guesses the precise words to say aloud, lest he disrupt their arrangement. Or hesitant in his touches, or even sometimes exceedingly needy and grasping at whatever he can to expend all his nervous energy, the anxiety spinning him out on a daily basis.
Jared’s mood is contagious, and Jensen smirks and grabs Jared’s face, fingers pushing into his cheeks to make his face pucker just before he leaves a smacking kiss on Jared’s lips. “It’ll save some water, too.”
Jared smirks, amused and free. “That’s totally what I was going for.”
“Of course,” Jensen agrees loftily.
*
With the water beating down on Jensen’s shoulders, the fancy shower head doing its job to massage any lingering tension from his body, Jared lathers up his hair before shoving extra suds into Jensen’s hair. Shampoo bubbles drip down Jensen’s forehead and Jared wipes them away, just to flick more at Jensen’s cheeks with bright laughter. Jensen lightly pushes him away with the complaint ready on his lips, only to be swallowed up by Jared’s kiss.
It’s just a few quick touches of mouth to mouth until Jared leads Jensen’s head back under the water to wash away the shampoo. Jensen goes with it, especially when Jared takes advantage of the angle to mouth along Jensen’s jaw, down his neck, and over his shoulder. Blinking away water and the last remnants of soap, Jensen tugs Jared close and pushes his hand through Jared’s hair to hold him in place. Encouraging him to take his time, despite early protests that they didn’t have much of the morning left to waste.
Luckily, Jared is keeping to his own promise of saving time and gets right to his intentions with one hand running down Jensen’s back to grip at his ass and the other down the front to wrap his fingers around Jensen’s cock.
Jensen’s breath comes quick and wet with Jared’s mouth working at the sensitive nerves along Jensen’s neck and now his hand pulling at his dick. He arches into Jared’s hold and lets himself fall into the shifting mood, playfully warm to sensual play.
Jared’s fist moves steady and sure, his other hand slipping down Jensen’s crack to tuck fingers against his hole in an cruel tease because Jensen won’t last with the tight pressure around his dick. And he says as much, with his voice high and breathy.
“I got you, babe,” Jared murmurs into Jensen’s neck, never breaking pace of his steady fist.
Babe echoes off the tiles, ricocheting all around Jensen’s skull, and his fingers twist tight in Jared’s hair so he can tug him into a rough kiss. It’s just a mess of tongues and teeth until Jensen moans into Jared’s mouth as he comes. Their mouths slow with Jensen’s all but going slack as he soars through the orgasm and finds himself unsteady on shaky legs.
Jared’s hands anchor at Jensen’s hips to hold him in place and stretch their kiss out longer. He reaches far into Jensen’s mouth with his tongue pressing all around, air shared until he has to break away to catch his breath.
“Turn around,” Jared orders even as he does it himself, spinning Jensen into the water. His hands take Jensen’s hips again, fingers tucked in tight, and he blankets himself to Jensen’s back with his dick sliding in the curve of Jensen’s ass.
Jensen sets his hands to the shower wall and ducks his head under the water, pushing his ass back for Jared to use. And Jared does, pulling back for a second before nudging himself under Jensen’s ass. His dick glides into the tunnel of Jensen’s legs, and Jensen clenches his thighs to give him more to work with. Anything to get Jared to the end, get him all fucked up and worn out with satisfaction.
Client satisfaction flies through Jensen’s mind before it’s replaced by Jared and the vision of the bright and airy smile on his face since he woke up.
He feels his cheeks burn under the hot water, but maybe also because his smile is pulled up high and tight when Jared sets his hand to one of Jensen’s, threading their fingers together in a fist held against tile. Jared’s other arm wraps around Jensen’s waist to tuck him in tight as he continues fucking between Jensen’s legs, thighs smacking together, panting growing louder and rougher as Jared gets closer with each thrust.
Jensen squeezes Jared’s hand and moves with him, quickening hips until Jared comes with a long, withered shout into the the back of Jensen’s neck. While Jared pants into his skin, Jensen pulls their hands together around him, taking the bulk of Jared’s sagging weight with a pleased smile making his cheeks burn again. He’s full on the pleasure that they’re both fully satisfied this morning.
*
The rest of their morning together fills out the domesticity of dressing together and wasting time with the morning news on TV and the USA Today from Jared’s doorstep.
Jensen hangs around as long as he can until he knows he can’t be any later to run home, change, and head into work. Surely Jared will miss the start of his meetings, but he doesn’t seem to care as he continues to stretch out the mood with more coffee and commentary on a puff piece about a dog park’s upcoming adoption event.
For a moment, though, Jared breaks from the interlude with a crooked smile, head tilted as he regards Jensen. “Do you have a dog? You seem like a dog person.”
Jensen freezes, a page of the paper held in the air, mid turn.
Just as fragile as his emotions getting into the fray is the chaos of sharing personal information with his clients. Jared pays for the set up, but that doesn’t include fitting himself into Jensen’s life outside this hotel suite.
Still, it pains him to hold anything back when Jared is always letting everything rush forth.
“No,” Jensen replies, a bit short and closed off. Then he finds himself asking, “Do you?”
Jared shakes his head and turns back to the TV with a strained frown. “I’m gone too much.”
Jensen finally turns that page, but he can’t focus on the words. “Yeah, I can see that.”
“What about before? Like growing up, did you have any pets?”
Those damn words still won’t make sense when Jensen stares at the paper, and he clears his throat as discomfort turns in his stomach. “Yeah, we had a few.”
Somehow, even this brief dip into his real life makes Jensen uneasy and he tosses the paper aside, nearly jumping up from the couch to get his jacket. “I’m gonna be late,” Jensen insists quickly, pushing a smile into place.
“Yeah, of course,” Jared says as he gets up and meets Jensen by the door. “I’ll be heading out in a few, too.” He takes a deep breath, shoulders rising high as that familiar strain returns. Especially when he mumbles, “So, I …”
Jensen softens his smile to ease him, because for all the progress made in the last twelve hours, Jared is about to dive right back into the daily dread of hiding himself. And that’s the last thing Jensen would ever wish for him, no matter how close they skate along Jensen’s personal life. He forces himself to turn his face up to Jared’s and keep himself open and free, like he’d been all night and this morning. “So, you?”
“I had a good night,” Jared finishes, quiet and content.
Jensen looks back at him with the hope it’s all reflected back at Jared, hope that he knows Jensen did, too. Easing back into that spirit, Jensen pats Jared’s chest, then tucks his fingers into the fabric as he pulls him in. “Have a nice day at work,” he whispers in the seconds before their lips meet and Jensen leaves him with the gentleness that had been threaded through their time together.
Out in the hallway, Jensen forces one foot in front of the other even when he hasn’t yet heard the door shut. He can picture Jared hanging in the doorway to watch him leave, and there’s a split second of pause as he thinks about turning around to wave, share a smile, whatever, just to stretch it out a little longer.
But then he thinks about the wall that’s been disintegrating the longer he’s been around Jared. He wonders at what point is the thing just a pile of unsalvageable rubble.
He’s in front of the elevators and pushing the down button when he recognizes that his doubt is enough to tumble a few more bricks. Especially when he glances back around the corner to see just a sliver of Jared slipping back into the room.
The door swinging shut serves as a temporary barrier between them and Jensen feels a warm coil of comfort pulling him back into himself to get on with his day.
Some other day, Jensen will have to fence himself off. Some other day, he’ll shove Jared at arm’s length and put a stop to this pretend world he’s crafted for him. There’s no sense to lead him on any longer, knowing Jared falls deeper into Jensen with every minute they spend together.
Until then, he’ll give himself a break for getting through work with a secret smile pinkening his cheeks. Until then, he can pretend, too.
Words: 3600
Rating/Warnings: NC-17/escort!Jensen
Summary: Jensen is a high-priced escort unable to say no to Jared, the lonely businessman craving normalcy
Notes: Domestic Dreams Verse. This is essentially Jensen’s POV of An Unconventional Contract, when Jared asks for the domestic arrangement. Title and cut from Imagine Dragons’ Polaroid.
Read on AO3
Jensen strolls into the suite with an easy smile that dissipates once Jared opens his mouth.
“I need to talk,” rushes out before Jared takes a short pause and corrects himself. “I mean, we. We need to talk.”
Breath catches in Jensen’s chest and he swears he hears his heart beating a little louder in his ears. His movements, on the other hand, are sluggish and tense, stopping in place and carefully turning to find Jared starting up a steady pace around the living room.
A dozen scenarios flash through his mind, many based on actual trouble he’s faced. Threats of calling the police, public photos, angry wives that clients insisted never existed are just the start.
“Is everything okay?” Jensen finally asks, doing his best to keep his voice steady. To keep himself pulled together and calm. There’s no sense in working himself up in a fury if this is just another one of Jared’s flares of anxiety.
Perverse as it is, Jensen so very much hopes that’s all it is. Like the few times they’ve been spotted in the bar downstairs, that one time they dared to head out for dinner, or even when Jensen found himself face to face with one of Jared’s coworkers in the elevator. That probably would not have been such a problem if Jensen hadn’t already introduced himself as an old college friend - who was engaged ... to a woman - and it wasn’t six in the morning.
Jared’s manic look, wide eyes frantically searching the room to avoid Jensen’s own worried gaze, cuts deep in Jensen’s gut and he’s now afraid for his own sanity. So he forces himself into crisis management and stands tall, shoulders firm, and hands on his waist as he waits for Jared to speak again.
It’s an absurdly long amount of waiting, patience worn thin and the impulse to bolt growing stronger by the second.
When Jared finally speaks again, it’s with a slow stutter tracing all his worries. “I just …I can’t … I don’t know … how.”
Jensen blinks. A dark little corner of his brain tells him this may not be a disaster of legal or physical conditions. Maybe it’s something emotional, something so wholly Jared that Jensen has to once again triage and heal with that side of him that weakens every time he walks out this door. The one that flares to life when he walks in.
Direct and cutting right through, Jensen asks, “Don’t know what? Is it life threatening?”
“Maybe. I don’t know.” Jared tugs at his hair before pushing it behind his ears. Along with Jared himself, his hair is a complete mess, and Jensen has thoughts of pulling Jared in tight and combing it into place, fingers sliding through soft waves with careful comfort to ease them both.
“No,” Jared continues. “In the big picture. Not really.”
“Is it anything that’ll get either of us in trouble?”
“No, nothing like that.”
Fear of the law, a court and judge that would hold nothing but contempt for Jensen’s side hustle, drops away from the list of possibilities and Jensen sighs. Tension drains from his shoulders down to his toes, though he’s trussed up with worry as Jared quietly apologizes.
“Did you do something?” Jensen asks, now flying through his list of contacts and clients, wondering who can handle whatever trouble Jared’s gotten himself into.
“Not yet,” he mutters.
“Okay, you need to relax,” Jensen orders as he heads to the side bar for drinks. He’s not equipped to handle whatever Jared is bringing to his doorstep without some liquor calming him. “And sit down.”
Two heavy pours and Jensen’s tempted to down them both himself. When he sees Jared listen to the directions and fall back into the couch, Jensen takes a simple sip of his own and offers a small smile along with the glass to Jared.
He sits in front of Jared, perching at the edge of the coffee table and leaning forward. He finds himself drinking in time with Jared and, beyond the soft tendril of heat spinning in his chest thanks to the alcohol, he thinks it’s good for them both. To sit in silence and find a rhythm somewhere between them to relax.
Jared glances at Jensen every few seconds, eyes darting away in shame. His mouth opens a few times until he finally complains, mostly to himself, “This is going to sound ridiculous.”
It takes a moment or two to make his voice smooth and level, hoping to calm them both. “I’m sure it won’t.”
From there, words fly between them and Jensen isn’t sure how they tumble down the hill together, but he suddenly finds himself staring a stack far thicker than usual in a familiarly innocent white envelope resting in his hands.
In this line of work, he’s been asked for a hundred things in a hundred different ways. There have been the rare moments he’s had to put his foot down, depending on the act or even the client, but he’s usually up for anything … all in the name of client satisfaction.
Here, he’s facing one client he will do just about anything to satisfy.
Jensen wonders what lies beyond just about.
The worry forces him to put the envelope on the chair beside him, placing it out of reach as they sort this thing out. As Jensen’s mind tumbles around the various possibilities, Jared’s request halts anything Jensen had been prepared to say.
“Pretend it’s a relationship ... when we’re together.”
Breathing is a labored thing, just like thinking becomes complicated.
Jensen knows he was already in trouble and this would be his complete unraveling. As if he wasn’t already spiraling away from sanity where Jared’s concerned, allowing his carefully constructed wall between business and real life crumble.
H’s long known, it hadn’t gone unnoticed, that Jared was seeking a connection, something more than just a quick fuck for cash.
Jensen fucking knew they were heading somewhere like this and he hadn’t done a single thing to stop them.
Just like he does nothing to stop it now, tumbling headfirst as he shifts to the edge of the table to watch Jared’s eyes flit closed and open.
“I’m sorry,” Jared whispers. This little boy is so low, lost, and broken, the sound cracks something deep in Jensen’s chest.
And like all the times before, Jensen will do whatever he can to put Jared back into a whole piece that can manage to look in the mirror without shame shadowing every angle of that beautiful face.
Jensen thinks he can see the ledge approaching fast as he makes his decision, leaping right off into a bottomless hole of hopelessness.
That’s what he is. Hopeless. All while Jared buries his hope far beneath the surface, dragging it out to the light whenever he sees Jensen.
Maybe, in another world, they’d be utterly perfect for one another.
When Jared opens his eyes again and searches Jensen’s face, that split in Jensens chest fuses itself over and something warm and easy fills him up. It brings a smile to his face and he brushes Jared off, brushes his own alarms away, and offers a gentle smile as he pulls off his jacket and takes care to set it over the envelope, hiding it away for the evening.
A burst of heat gets him moving forward to press a kiss to Jared’s forehead, murmuring on his way back to sit. “You’re adorable when you fidget.”
“I’m not,” Jared replies, pushing the words out like a petulant toddler.
Jensen slips into what should be a wholly constructed character, but is, in fact, not far from his own truth when he smirks and says, “And when you’re utterly clueless, babe.”
There’s a long pause after babe, and Jensen holds his breath with fear that it’s too much, especially so fast.
Jared’s eyes brighten, shoulders shifting with relief. “You’re starting already.”
Walls be damned, Jensen can play himself better than any other persona in his tool box, and he rolls up his shirt sleeves and pats Jared’s knees. “So what’d you want to do for dinner?”
Jared sucks in a deep breath with his eyes watering and cheeks going red, and Jensen runs his thumbs inside Jared’s knees while he keeps his gaze steady and caring, encouraging. “Room service?” Jared asks with a shaky laugh.
Nodding, Jensen easily agrees, “Room service it is.”
*
Jensen wakes before Jared and takes advantage of the quiet lull of daybreak to look at Jared beside him.
Hair covers part of his eye and cheek, half his face pressed into the pillow, most of his body tucked into itself. Except for one hand peeking out from under the covers and set on the mattress just a few scant inches from Jensen.
He lets himself have the moment to draw lines down each of Jared’s fingers as he thinks about the peace on Jared’s face as he sleeps. In direct contrast to when Jensen first showed up last night, Jared is comfortable and calm with whatever dreams keep him company.
Even when Jensen knows he’s plowed through every warning of the last two years with Jared, there’s great relief to see Jared at rest. To know Jared has found his middle ground to make this whole precarious situation work for him.
Jared’s fingers curl against the sheet, reaching and grabbing for something, and Jensen waits for him to wake. Holds his breath in anticipation of those sleepy eyes blinking to brightness.
Intead, Jared settles deeper in the blankets and Jensen kisses Jared’s knuckled fist then quietly slips from bed.
Room service is called, a full platter of eggs, pancakes, fruit, and bacon. Lots and lots of bacon, Jared’s favorite, he thinks with a smile. Jensen busies himself with an early morning show on the TV in the living room, at the ready for the knock at the door before it’s loud enough to drag Jared out of bed.
When the cart arrives, Jensen rolls it right into the bedroom, a smile spreading when Jared is coming out of sleep and pulling himself up against the headboard with a confused, yet pleased look.
“Breakfast in bed?”
Jensen nods then swats Jared’s leg with a quick, “Scoot,” to make room for him at the edge of the mattress. He slides into the small space so they’re facing each other, side by side, legs stretched out with plates resting in their laps.
Before Jared can ask, Jensen passes a glass of orange juice along with the tiny pitcher of syrup. Jared thanks him with an easy, charmed smile, and the continue to eat in silence while sharing pleased glances in between requests for coffee and sugar, more napkins, and bacon. Of course, bacon.
Halfway through, Jared drops his arms to his side, one hand landing on Jensen’s knee. He looks at Jensen, damn near diving right into him with the open, soft look. “Thank you.”
Jensen hides his face in favor of cutting more pancake. It shouldn’t make him shiver how kind Jared’s voice is, how intent his eyes are. But here Jensen is, doing his best to deflect with a breezy, “I know you love your bacon.”
“I do love my meat.”
A quick look and Jensen deadpans, eyes glazed over with a short grimace. “You …”
Jared chuckles, stuffing another strip of bacon in his mouth. “I do,” he says through chewing with full, pink cheeks.
Jensen raises a quick eyebrow before letting a smile slip through, along with a sneaky glance before pulling more eggs together with his fork.
“I also love breakfast in bed,” Jared says, again kind and hushed. His hand rubs along the side of Jensen’s leg, fingers curling under.
“You’re welcome.” After a full drink of coffee, Jensen watches him and carefully aligns the right words that fit their new charade. “But don’t settle in too much. We have to get ready and head off to work soon. I know you’ve got a full day of meetings again.”
“I do,” Jared agrees as he puts his plate to the side. He leans in with his hand moving up Jensen’s leg until it’s settled at the hip. “But we could shower together, save some time.”
Jensen’s reminded of waking not long ago when Jared was so at ease, and Jared continues be loose and relaxed. There are no startled thoughts as he second-guesses the precise words to say aloud, lest he disrupt their arrangement. Or hesitant in his touches, or even sometimes exceedingly needy and grasping at whatever he can to expend all his nervous energy, the anxiety spinning him out on a daily basis.
Jared’s mood is contagious, and Jensen smirks and grabs Jared’s face, fingers pushing into his cheeks to make his face pucker just before he leaves a smacking kiss on Jared’s lips. “It’ll save some water, too.”
Jared smirks, amused and free. “That’s totally what I was going for.”
“Of course,” Jensen agrees loftily.
*
With the water beating down on Jensen’s shoulders, the fancy shower head doing its job to massage any lingering tension from his body, Jared lathers up his hair before shoving extra suds into Jensen’s hair. Shampoo bubbles drip down Jensen’s forehead and Jared wipes them away, just to flick more at Jensen’s cheeks with bright laughter. Jensen lightly pushes him away with the complaint ready on his lips, only to be swallowed up by Jared’s kiss.
It’s just a few quick touches of mouth to mouth until Jared leads Jensen’s head back under the water to wash away the shampoo. Jensen goes with it, especially when Jared takes advantage of the angle to mouth along Jensen’s jaw, down his neck, and over his shoulder. Blinking away water and the last remnants of soap, Jensen tugs Jared close and pushes his hand through Jared’s hair to hold him in place. Encouraging him to take his time, despite early protests that they didn’t have much of the morning left to waste.
Luckily, Jared is keeping to his own promise of saving time and gets right to his intentions with one hand running down Jensen’s back to grip at his ass and the other down the front to wrap his fingers around Jensen’s cock.
Jensen’s breath comes quick and wet with Jared’s mouth working at the sensitive nerves along Jensen’s neck and now his hand pulling at his dick. He arches into Jared’s hold and lets himself fall into the shifting mood, playfully warm to sensual play.
Jared’s fist moves steady and sure, his other hand slipping down Jensen’s crack to tuck fingers against his hole in an cruel tease because Jensen won’t last with the tight pressure around his dick. And he says as much, with his voice high and breathy.
“I got you, babe,” Jared murmurs into Jensen’s neck, never breaking pace of his steady fist.
Babe echoes off the tiles, ricocheting all around Jensen’s skull, and his fingers twist tight in Jared’s hair so he can tug him into a rough kiss. It’s just a mess of tongues and teeth until Jensen moans into Jared’s mouth as he comes. Their mouths slow with Jensen’s all but going slack as he soars through the orgasm and finds himself unsteady on shaky legs.
Jared’s hands anchor at Jensen’s hips to hold him in place and stretch their kiss out longer. He reaches far into Jensen’s mouth with his tongue pressing all around, air shared until he has to break away to catch his breath.
“Turn around,” Jared orders even as he does it himself, spinning Jensen into the water. His hands take Jensen’s hips again, fingers tucked in tight, and he blankets himself to Jensen’s back with his dick sliding in the curve of Jensen’s ass.
Jensen sets his hands to the shower wall and ducks his head under the water, pushing his ass back for Jared to use. And Jared does, pulling back for a second before nudging himself under Jensen’s ass. His dick glides into the tunnel of Jensen’s legs, and Jensen clenches his thighs to give him more to work with. Anything to get Jared to the end, get him all fucked up and worn out with satisfaction.
Client satisfaction flies through Jensen’s mind before it’s replaced by Jared and the vision of the bright and airy smile on his face since he woke up.
He feels his cheeks burn under the hot water, but maybe also because his smile is pulled up high and tight when Jared sets his hand to one of Jensen’s, threading their fingers together in a fist held against tile. Jared’s other arm wraps around Jensen’s waist to tuck him in tight as he continues fucking between Jensen’s legs, thighs smacking together, panting growing louder and rougher as Jared gets closer with each thrust.
Jensen squeezes Jared’s hand and moves with him, quickening hips until Jared comes with a long, withered shout into the the back of Jensen’s neck. While Jared pants into his skin, Jensen pulls their hands together around him, taking the bulk of Jared’s sagging weight with a pleased smile making his cheeks burn again. He’s full on the pleasure that they’re both fully satisfied this morning.
*
The rest of their morning together fills out the domesticity of dressing together and wasting time with the morning news on TV and the USA Today from Jared’s doorstep.
Jensen hangs around as long as he can until he knows he can’t be any later to run home, change, and head into work. Surely Jared will miss the start of his meetings, but he doesn’t seem to care as he continues to stretch out the mood with more coffee and commentary on a puff piece about a dog park’s upcoming adoption event.
For a moment, though, Jared breaks from the interlude with a crooked smile, head tilted as he regards Jensen. “Do you have a dog? You seem like a dog person.”
Jensen freezes, a page of the paper held in the air, mid turn.
Just as fragile as his emotions getting into the fray is the chaos of sharing personal information with his clients. Jared pays for the set up, but that doesn’t include fitting himself into Jensen’s life outside this hotel suite.
Still, it pains him to hold anything back when Jared is always letting everything rush forth.
“No,” Jensen replies, a bit short and closed off. Then he finds himself asking, “Do you?”
Jared shakes his head and turns back to the TV with a strained frown. “I’m gone too much.”
Jensen finally turns that page, but he can’t focus on the words. “Yeah, I can see that.”
“What about before? Like growing up, did you have any pets?”
Those damn words still won’t make sense when Jensen stares at the paper, and he clears his throat as discomfort turns in his stomach. “Yeah, we had a few.”
Somehow, even this brief dip into his real life makes Jensen uneasy and he tosses the paper aside, nearly jumping up from the couch to get his jacket. “I’m gonna be late,” Jensen insists quickly, pushing a smile into place.
“Yeah, of course,” Jared says as he gets up and meets Jensen by the door. “I’ll be heading out in a few, too.” He takes a deep breath, shoulders rising high as that familiar strain returns. Especially when he mumbles, “So, I …”
Jensen softens his smile to ease him, because for all the progress made in the last twelve hours, Jared is about to dive right back into the daily dread of hiding himself. And that’s the last thing Jensen would ever wish for him, no matter how close they skate along Jensen’s personal life. He forces himself to turn his face up to Jared’s and keep himself open and free, like he’d been all night and this morning. “So, you?”
“I had a good night,” Jared finishes, quiet and content.
Jensen looks back at him with the hope it’s all reflected back at Jared, hope that he knows Jensen did, too. Easing back into that spirit, Jensen pats Jared’s chest, then tucks his fingers into the fabric as he pulls him in. “Have a nice day at work,” he whispers in the seconds before their lips meet and Jensen leaves him with the gentleness that had been threaded through their time together.
Out in the hallway, Jensen forces one foot in front of the other even when he hasn’t yet heard the door shut. He can picture Jared hanging in the doorway to watch him leave, and there’s a split second of pause as he thinks about turning around to wave, share a smile, whatever, just to stretch it out a little longer.
But then he thinks about the wall that’s been disintegrating the longer he’s been around Jared. He wonders at what point is the thing just a pile of unsalvageable rubble.
He’s in front of the elevators and pushing the down button when he recognizes that his doubt is enough to tumble a few more bricks. Especially when he glances back around the corner to see just a sliver of Jared slipping back into the room.
The door swinging shut serves as a temporary barrier between them and Jensen feels a warm coil of comfort pulling him back into himself to get on with his day.
Some other day, Jensen will have to fence himself off. Some other day, he’ll shove Jared at arm’s length and put a stop to this pretend world he’s crafted for him. There’s no sense to lead him on any longer, knowing Jared falls deeper into Jensen with every minute they spend together.
Until then, he’ll give himself a break for getting through work with a secret smile pinkening his cheeks. Until then, he can pretend, too.